‘You embarrassed me’: Boyfriend Proposes in Grandiose Way, Despite Girlfriend Wanting an Intimate Proposal, So She Gets Him Out of His Father’s Will

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    r/AITAH • 8 days ago Valuable Pristine8037 AITA for walking out of my engagement party and refusing to answer calls for three days?
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    My (now) ex-boyfriend proposed four days ago. Let's call him Tim. Tim and I have been together for two years. We talked about marriage, (we are both 26) and kids, etc, and till last week I thought I had the perfect love life. Now, Tim has his best friend Mimi (fake name). Tim also has a
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    friend group he is very close to. The problem throughout our relationship was, that Tim would place me last whenever his friends were involved. He missed a promotion dinner for my work because Mimi's dog was throwing up. He missed Diwali celebrations with my family because his
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    friends wanted him to help paint their new house. Plus, some issues during his teenage years involving his friends, resulted in his dad threatening to take away his inheritance and distribute it to relatives. For context: His dad introduced us, and till last year, before I left the workplace which I
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    joined straight after college, his dad was my boss. I still see him as a father figure and respect him a lot.
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    Now, I have outright told Tim that I don't like public proposals. I am very introverted, and having eyes on me during a loving moment will only cause me anxiety. Tim said he understood and promised he wouldn't do one when he proposed. Another thing I told Tim was that Mimi treats me
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    passive-aggressively because I'm kind of an anxious person, (I have mild OCD), and asked him to not involve her in our affairs. Tim said Mimi only wants the best for us. I kind of didn't press the issue after he got defensive.
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    Thursday, after I entered my flat, I was greeted by all of Tim's friends, with Tim in a suit, and a ring in hand. I kid you not, my flat was swarmed. There were people I didn't even know! Before Tim even said anything Mimi chimed in and said: "Chill OP, dear god, this is not the time to make that
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    face." I saw red. I was having a severe anxiety attack, as I don't do well with lots of people. I calmly told them that there would be no proposal and to get the out of my flat. They looked like in shock, so I just left my flat with just my purse, called my best friend on the way and told her to
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    get them out, and just called a car service and sat in the car, crying, for two hours and went to my cabin I brought. I texted my parents, so they wouldn't worry and told them to not take Tim's calls, switched off my phone, and stayed there. Luckily I had enough cash to make a grocery
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    run, and the cabin was used last month. I only switched my phone on when I was calling a car and saw the barrage of calls and texts. I called Tim in the car, and he sounded defeated and kept on apologizing and crying. I told him it was over. Turns out my best friend told his dad, who was so
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    mad, he told him that he would only get half his inheritance.
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    I now feel that I reacted very badly and could have handled it with grace. I might have let my anxiety take over and overreacted and I cost Tim his money. AITA?
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    Edit: My ex-bf and I are both Indians. One of the reasons why Tim's dad likes me is that I am from the same culture (though I am not comfortable with this reasoning). I am a lawyer and make enough money to buy and maintain a flat and a cabin. Tim only has access to my flat.
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    The_Crown_And_A... • 8d ago So essentially, the proposal was what MIMI wanted Not what you wanted. She knew you weren't going to like it which was why she made the statement that
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    she did right when you walked in This was her goal the entire time. She wants your ex to herself
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    So don't feel bad for your ex. He's a dumbass and he's stuck with Mimi now
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    That being said CHANGE THE LOCKS ON YOUR APARTMENT
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    And when you get home, make sure nothing is missing and nothing is damaged or broken. If it is, send the bill to your ex. Frankly, I'd have the entire place deep cleaned and send him the bill as well as the bill for the locksmith.
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    Odds are his father would force him to pay for it Look...Mimi wants your ex. She was always going to ruin your relationship so just be glad it happened now before marriage and kids were involved
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    WindowPixie • 8d ago I've often pondered in horror what I would do if my partner sprung this kind of proposal on me, and "Immediately fleeing to my cabin that nobody else can come to" is top tier.
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    Tim deserves this.
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    GraceMDrake • 8d ago NTA This was totally a set up to goad you into breaking off the relationship. Tim is just interested in his dad's money. Too bad for Tim his dad saw right through the stunt. You can do so much better.
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    HotCheeks_PCT • 8d ago NTA and I bet he ends up marrying Mimi within 2 years.
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    mypreciousssssssss • 7d ago Tim said Mimi only wants the best for us. Yes, when Tim says Mimi "wants the best for us" it's true "us" being Tim and - Mimi.
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    NTA, good for you for knowing your worth and finally putting your foot down.
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    FunStorm6487 • 8d ago I do love to see women knowing their own worth, and noping the out!!!

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